The Path of Life

Trail to Gleneden Beach, Oregon - my kids during Spring Break 2010

"You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." Psalm 16:11

If there are pleasures at His right hand then I will set aside the tasks of the day, turn off the demands I feel need attention soon, and tell myself there is nothing else that my heart desires more then waiting at his feet.

When I am on the path of life I am not immune to the wiles of the evil one. He is crafty and seeks my attention through the false ideas in this life. He is like this little snake my husband found on the side of the path whispering words like, "You will fill your tank with some time just reading a book or watching a movie, or eating something sweet. There is nothing immoral with those things. Besides, you are hurting and reading the Bible and praying is hard work. You need brain power and you can't sit up or even kneel because of your pain. Just take care of you. God gives grace." I've listened to such things and veered off the path.

"A man has to undergo a long and fierce inner struggle before he learns fully to master himself, and to direct his whole love towards God. When a man relies on himself, he often comes to rely on human consolations. ~ Thomas A' Kempis in The Imitation of Christ

I am searching for life and joy and pleasures in the midst of pain, in the midst of the stresses of parenting, in the midst of balancing the needs of ministry and supporting my husband in it. I will admit that when my new injury prevented me from having my quiet time the exact way I like it, I settled for less. Then I turned to hobbies that I enjoy to try to fill the time or distract me from the pain or depressed feelings. After a couple of weeks of this I was even more depleted and depressed.

"Untended fires soon die and become just a pile of ashes."
~ 80 year old Retired Missionary
quoted from Gail MacDonald's book High Call High Privilege

This quote reminded me what I was allowing to happen. The fire of my relationship with God must be fueled everyday or it will die. I found myself warming up to other people's fires through well written blog posts, or a good conversation with my husband or friend on what they are learning from the Bible or how they are growing in Christ. All the while my fire was left alone with very little wood thrown on it due to new restrictions.

"Fire will always burn on the altar, which the believer shall nourish, putting wood underneath in the morning, every day, so that the fire may not go out."
~ Walter Hilton of Thurgarton

I have new hurdles to overcome to be able to stoke the fire and be warmed by Christ. I'm having to lay aside more things. Family members have to pick up my responsibilities. I have to cancel on friendly coffee appointments and I hate to be a disappointment. An added injury with slow healing due to fibromyalgia has tested my belief that the path of life and joy and pleasures are found in Him. However, I'm back on the path that leads to quiet waters and He is restoring my soul.

As I was sharing these thoughts with Matt he thought of the parable of the Pearl of great price: “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it," Matthew 13:45-46. What jumps out to me here is the fact that the merchant is searching. This is active, not passive. I can't just expect to stumble upon fine nuggets in my day that will make me feel close to God. I have to pursue him. I have a bead on my Pandora bracelet representing my choice that all I have should be forsaken for Him alone. I need the dangle of something physical to remind me to stop and savor my Savior.

As I have been meditating on Psalm 16:11, so has T.M. Moore. The Greatest Blessing written by T.M. at the Colson Center for Christian Worldview is an article that gives further thought and resources to finding life in God's presence. This website is another tool God uses in my life to remind me that He is the source of joy!

If I stay on the path and ignore the enemy's lies I find an ocean of pleasure in God's presence like my kids did at Gleneden Beach!